Time Management

I should have probably eased up on planning my kid’s birthday party last month when I realized 44 people confirmed attendance - YIKES!    What can I say, I love birthdays... not just mine, but anybody's because it’s a great opportunity to catch up with the people that matter to us.  Once upon a time, it was effortless to be with these people, that you can do it just about everyday. Now that I'm living at least an hour away from friends and family it’s been especially difficult to catch up.  Not only are we spreading away from each other geographically, but work schedules took precedence over many things, leaving only the weekends to maintain these relationships.  Reminds me of the time I volunteered for the Special Olympics.  I was assigned to escort participants to the starting line.  At one point, I was escorting about six 4-6 year olds to the starting line for a 100 meter dash.  When setting out to cross the field to the starting point, we were all holding hands, but as we walked on, about four of the kids on both ends let go and wandered away from the group.  I was frozen, how could I gather those kids without losing the ones that stayed with me?  The longer it took me to act, the farther away they were getting.  Which leaves me to wonder, how can I hold on to important relationships while preserving my livelihood?

I maintained, as much as I can, the attitude that although three years of work was a significant amount of time, it was still temporary.   But I am also susceptible to allowing my job to cross over personal boundaries:  occupying more time out of my days, corrupting my emotional and mental well-being, and even degrading my physical wellness by spending at least 40 hours a week sitting in front of a computer.  Leaving little of myself to other matters of my life.  I understand that the bills have to be paid, but overworking has become such common practice that my self worth was gauged on gross income/assets, blanketed by so many distractions of wants disguised as needs, losing sight of what’s really important in life.  John Trudell, Native American activist, speaks of the "Spirit Eater," as an authoritarian systems that siphon off human energy to fuel a materialistic, technological reality. We are delusional to think that working more and gaining monetary assets will wash over our problems and improve our quality of life.  When in fact, it is the very thing that contributes to the misery. 

As I got closer to the termination date, reality set in and I had no choice but to ease up on my dependency to the job.  Rewiring my approach to spending really helped to differentiate my needs and my wants.  For instance, when I think I ”need” something, I go to my basement or attic and realize I already have it.  Or I get distracted by an item I forgot I had and for some reason, it satisfies the so-called need.  Either way, it kept me from shelling out some cash, and best of all I've just (very, very slowly) unpacked some of our boxes from our move.  Other times, I wait it out, until by chance, I come upon the item for FREE!!! I recently acquired a metal file cabinet from someone’s sidewalk who put it out for garbage pickup (gotta love the sidewalk boutique).  I’ve been talking myself out of this $300 purchase for almost a year, and finally, the waiting paid off.  All of a sudden, my lifeline to the 9-5 (or more) is not so desperate.  I’m realizing I don’t need that much cash flow to run our household.  I would say, one of our biggest expense is travel.  Not only for work, but also to visit friends/family.  We’ve refrained from so much frivolous/impulse spending (I can’t tell you the last time I bought a new outfit) that we were able to book a trip to visit friends and family in the Philippines for when I’m out of work.  An expense that definitely contribute to our quality of life instead of take away.  

Life’s demands tend to steer us away from each other so if we don’t have much time for anything else, at least we can come together to celebrate life’s milestones (i.e. birthdays).  Bring on your 44 guests!!

4-Drawer Metal File Cabinet = $10 (for black spray paint), Sidewalk Boutique

Globe = $0, Sidewalk Boutique; Fancy cloth under the globe = $0, basement find